Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Two tickets to Mordor, please!

It's been an interesting month to be sure. I don't have very many funny things (just watch, I'll hear one at dinner after I post this..), but rather something that touched me.

I was at the bus stop with my boyfriend and he was clutching his chai like none other. Poor guy got no sleep last night, and was running on caffeine. It wasn't a good day. "But it's okay now, I have chai." That got me thinking: how often is it that the little things in life make bad days better? Often enough; it really is the little things in life that make it great. :)

On a side note on tonight's menu: Chicken wings of fire. My initial reaction was: "Are they from Mordor?!" Kat B. thought the name sounded sketch.
And for your amusement:


Thursday, September 29, 2011

Butter Knives (With A Little Bit of College Ranting)

Well here we are again. I'm getting better about this blogging thing it would seem after being absent for a while. First, I would like to rant about classes and class schedule and registration for upcoming semesters. I would like to rant by simply saying: ARGH! Why must there be so many interesting classes and so little time?! I want to take like 24 credit hours next semester but I can't and it's frustrating and....yea. End rant.

Now on to the shtuff you care about and actually want to read: funny things I hear. I only have one today but I promise it's a good one. As I was returning to my dorm rather late tonight, one guy was talking to another and was telling what sounded like a very epic tale. He proceeded to tell his friend that "He walked out with this butter knife going AAAAAHHHHHHHHRRRRRR!" Why a butter knife? Isn't that kind of an ineffective weapon? I mean it would take a lot to kill someone with a butter knife. And why did he sound like a pirate? Was he trying to reenact a battle between Jack Sparrow and Davy Jones but he lacked a sword and chose a butter knife instead? I mean this is overall just a very confusing story. Nonetheless, I do think you win the award for most interesting conversation of the day today so DINGDINGDING you're a winner and you win.....a place on our blog?? Well, sounds good to me!

That's all I have for today folks so enjoy!!

Kat B <3

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

A Catch Up: Degrading English, Prostitution, and Boners

Alright, I know it's been a while guys. Sorry about that but we've been busy with this thing called college and tests and other such like. So this is a catch up blog with several fun stories all tossed into one really odd audiologic salad.

Our first quote today comes from a conversation I heard between two fellows walking behind me late one night on campus. The first said to the second, "Travel safely." The second responded with, in a very frustrated and upset tone, "What the hell did you just say? God whatever happened to just saying peace out to people?! It's like people don't even speak English anymore!" Well dude, I'll agree with you there. People really don't speak English anymore. I mean your poor friend there must be stuck in the polite and clearly awful late 19th century. How awful! As for you, I mean clearly you've got a strong grasp of what's going down. Peace out is the best option for how to say good by to people, none of this namby pamby travel safely stuff. Traveling as fast and as dangerous as possible is obviously the best way to go. Thanks for the update on the deteriorating English language buddy.

Next up we have a comment made with no context. "I really don't have that big of an issue with prostitution." Well...coming from a dude I guess that could make sense but, no, this comment came from a girl. What? You....What?! It turns out she later explained her reasoning and it kinda made sense but to begin with I just have one thing to say. What the hell? You don't have a problem with women selling themselves for sex toys? To each their own I guess.... O.o

And finally, and probably one of my most favorite quotes of all came from a guy at Washakie walking along and trying to, as it sounded, comfort his buddy. He patted him on the back and told him in a very wise and noble tone, "Love is like a boner..." Wait what? Hang on, there's more. "Sometimes you just can't control it." Now I'm not sure if this guy is my new favorite philosopher or if he needs to be smacked upside the head. I was so torn between going 'awwww how sweet' and saying 'ewww what the devil?!' Love and a boner. Who would have thought they could be equated to each other and even with a little explaination tagged on. I have to give the guy props though, I mean I wouldn't have come up with that and I can bet you anything he at least made his mate crack a smile. So way to be a good friend random guy!

Well that's all I have for now! I'll keep you posted on any other interesting things we hear in the nearish future assuming my 8am doesn't kill me first!

Kat B

Thursday, September 1, 2011

A lesson on the FBI, ostriches, and psychology - my favorite things.

What is normal? According to a dictionary it is "Conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural." The psychological definition (according to dictionary.com) is "Approximately average in any psychological trait, as intelligence, personality, or emotional adjustment. Free from any mental disorder; sane." Makes sense. Another way of looking at it (and the psychology term I learned) is those behaviors that are not maladaptive.


So. As one sits in Washakie and twenty ROTC guys walk in, in uniform, this sparks quite a bit of conversation. You can tell, they get a lot of attention. I mean, who doesn't like a guy in uniform? They may not be military yet, but damn, they are cute and the stereotype of a soldier definitely surrounds them.


What does all this talk of being normal have to do with ROTC? Normally, they wouldn't have a thing to do with each other unless..well, you are us. Every guy that walked by our table (and of course we got the centrally located table), got a stare and a few giggles. This isn't so bad. Growing up near four military bases will get you accustomed to the sight of uniforms and...in theory...quench some of the heartthrob that comes from seeing hotness all the freaking time. The problem? Once Kat² gets talking about things that are sexy, we have an interesting time getting our brains to catch up with our mouths. For instance, we both want to be in the FBI, so naturally, we combine the FBI with uniforms. We have determined that military, police, and FBI uniforms are sexy.


What is so sexy about an FBI uniform? Well...let me tell you. Business attire screams "I'm intelligent and outgoing enough to pursue this hard job and fought to get the position. In order to get in I had to be in shape and have enough experience." And guess what? The FBI is looking for military people. Then there is the other half of the uniform: the big, bold, bullet-proof vest that screams "FBI". Yes, over the course of ten minutes, Kat² discussed how sexy bullet-proof vests are. Those are built for protection, but they are form fitting enough and give your subconscious some food for thought (namely that the person wearing it is, usually, out there for the good of the country, justice, and knows how to handle a gun. What more could you want?!). We asked ourselves, is this really normal?

From a psychological standpoint, maybe not. I mean, if you screw too many FBI agents, they do know how to use a gun after all. And you can't just attack one every time you walk into the office. That is maladaptive if you ask me. It's like an ostrich pretending to be a flamingo. It just doesn't work that way. (Yes, some girl in Washakie posed like a flamingo and said she was an ostrich. Come on, if you are in the Honors program, at least know your basic zoo animals. Do us a favor.)


So thank you, Federal Bureau of Investigation and Criminal Minds for making bullet-proof vests so sexy. You have two adoring college girls at your mercy.I leave you with these images.

Ps. Who's excited for the new season of Criminal Minds on September 21st?!

(See, even looks good on women! I'm beginning to think this is becoming an obsession..and that this is what happens when you live in Wyoming.)

Kat S.





Wednesday, August 31, 2011

The key to being a stalker

Stalkers. Ninjas. That random guy creeping on you from the ninth story window as you read this post. They're all relatively the same thing. And all of them have one very important skill to what they do- it must be, above all, secret. Ninjas wouldn't be awesome if we knew what they did; the guy wouldn't be creepy if he was screaming at you that he was looking at you; and when you don't keep stalking a secret, you get reported to the police. That's just unproductive.

Now, you may be wondering where does the quote come in? From this girl who informed her friend in a very audible whisper, "Secretly, I'm a stalker."

Two key points I would like to make about this. One: It's not a secret anymore you silly girl! You don't tell people this kind of stuff!! GOSH! Two: Who you stalkin' girl? Cuz if he's cute, please introduce me and I'll have a grand ol' time getting to know him and getting into his bed so you can be all sad-face that your stalkee is now taken. THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR TELLING THE SECRET!!

PS. I'd stalk this guy!




Kat B

Monday, August 29, 2011

The Wyoming Ocean

Sometimes the best things in life are those that are unexpected. Like getting cookies in the mail, or Kmart adds. Who doesn't love Kmart adds? But maybe the greatest surprise is finding out that there are crabs in Wyoming.

"Wait, crab..in Wyoming....in the cafeteria?" Said the girl behind me in disbelief.

Yes, hun. There is also a huge ocean taking up half of what used to be Wyoming where they get them. Did you know there is this marvelous thing called transportation? Nowadays it doesn't take six months to cross the continent. I wouldn't be laughing my butt off, or even mildly amused, if this came from a ditsy cheerleader (sorry, as a psychology major I should know that stereotypes aren't always accurate, but this is the first thing that came to mind), however, it came from the mouth of a "I'm a tough basketball/ track star" type athlete.

She could have been talking about those genetically mutated hermit crabs I set loose. Those little goobers just can't resist people. My bad.






Acceptance- Apparently underrated

So today in Prexy's there was a small little group of people sitting with a sign that said 'Random Acts of Homosexuality.' Now I have no idea what they were doing or what was really going on there, but regardless they made me smile. It's nice to know people can be okay with others and what they choose to do with and be in their lives.

What made me laugh outright however, was the guy walking along in the opposite direction who exclaimed in a very whiny and oddly petulant voice, "Why do we have to be accepted on this campus?!" Well, you see dear Sir, it's really all just to piss you off. We know you like being an outsider so we're going to make everyone accepted to make you be really creative in order to be judged harshly by others. No longer can you simply be gay. No, now you must do something more original and horrific.

If I may offer to you some suggestions: become a cannibal (no one approves of that unless you're stuck on some island with nothing to eat but your dead buddy Paul), eat some Mongolian cat (see previous post about this delicious snack that tends to horrify others), or kidnap, kill, and wear the skin of other humans around campus (yes we're talking about you Ed Gein).

So the moral of the story is this: Wyoming is just too darn accepting of all of us diverse people and if you want to be judged you are left with the option of doing something entirely gruesome, or you could always just move somewhere else.

PS. So guys, I was thinking...we should start an "I love serial killers" club here on campus. Who wants to join?




Kat B.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Hay and it's apparent many uses

So Kat S. has already introduced herself by filling you in on an interesting comment heard at dinner and I thought I would start by telling you about one of my first classes here on campus. The teacher, in the space of an hour, made three separate references to hay. Now, note: I am not a Wyoming native- in fact, in total I have been here less than two weeks. So, needless to say, I didn't get any of said references. So here they are:
1. "It's like watching a bail of wet hay."
     Side note: I now understand this. Wet hay can apparently spontaneously and randomly catch fire. So I get that now.
2. After referencing different cultures and how some are assumed to be the same: "It's like saying there's only one kind of hay."
    Wait...there's more than one?? Well, slap my butt and call me ignorant. Who woulda thunk it?
3. In reference to doing your homework: "As important as hay."
    What? Now I'm confused. Are you telling me not to do my homework? Cuz that's definitely what I'm getting out of this...

So all, there you have it. I don't know anything about hay, probably won't for some time to come, and yes, we do hear random things around campus so entertain yourselves with that.

PS Hot pots are the absolute frickin' best inventions on the planet. Just sayin'.

And for your entertainment: Well Kat S. already gave you a picture of a kitty so I shall resort tooooo a picture of...........one of the most attractive guys ever!



Kat B <3

And to think I opened the door.

It seems that college students have plenty that they could regret: not studying for an exam (or not doing homework), having one drink too many (and funny thing is, in a town this size, if you are pulled over for anything, you are asked if you have been drinking), or going for the wrong major...five times. Or, if you are the girl in Washakie (the University's dining center): "I can't believe I opened the door for that bitch."

Now that is one understandable regret. I wouldn't want to open the door for "that bitch" either, whom ever she may be. I can't imagine what makes her a bitch. Maybe she stole your chocolate mint cookie (Washakie has excellent desserts)? God knows, but if she did that, I would be pissed too. Cookies are too valuable to leave in the care of anyone but yourself. Everyone knows that to college kids food is life. We just can't get enough.

Another thing about college is the dorms. From our room you could creep on people in Washakie, the frat houses, and the lawns and roads in between. Just a moment ago we saw a blond frat guy in a suit (Kat one, looking out the window: "Cute blond frat guy in a suit." Kat two, runs over to window: "Ooooh, hello blond frat guy in a suit...what are you doing?!" Hehe, yeah, this is us on a good day. Needless to say, we are crazy). I would suggest bringing ear plugs; those frat guys can be loud at the oddest hours. Also, don't learn the hard way like we did: bring a f***ing fan. It's hot in the dorms. 

One more note: be careful around us. We are very odd in the fact that we find great amusement in disturbing things. Someone mentioned a cat and gross food at the dinner table (whether in conjunction or not), and staring straight at the Mongolian food station, I spurted out, "Mongolian cat." I guess not all of the people at the table appreciated the mental image. The Kats were greatly amused at the thought of either 1) some strange Mongolian fighting cat, or 2) a Mongolian fried cat as the main course of the next meal. Either way, beware. Guess that is what happens when you both want to go into law enforcement, see dead people so that you can mess with them scientifically, and watch too many episodes of Criminal Minds and Law and Order when you should be sleeping.


So yeah, whenever we hear some odd conversation on our adventures around campus we shall post. Enjoy.


Kat S.